Don't you hate giving Valentine's gifts?

First, there's that apprehension as they fondle the paper.

Then the forced grin as they give it a "comedy" shake (not too hard, in case it's a diamond-encrusted tiara).

And before long, the wrapping paper lies shredded on the carpet.

Along with their diamond-encrusted hopes and dreams.

Thank crap for Crapping Paper™ - the wrapping paper that ruins the surprise!

Download and print one of our Classic Crapping Papers™ or create your own using our handy Crapping Paper™ Generator.

And say goodbye to awkward smiles and thankless platitudes forever.

Crapping Paper™ for the most classic of Valentine's gifts. From plush toys to sex toys to those really rubbish last-minute gifts from the garage down the road.

We've got all the classics covered, but if you can't find what you're looking for, why not head down to the Crapping Paper™ Generator?

Chosen a classic? Click the one you want, download the PDF and print it out (at work, not at home silly). And you'll be living crappily ever after in no time!

"It's all I can afford!"
Download PDF

"It's from Ann Summers!"
Download PDF

"It's contraception!"
Download PDF

"It's from the garage!"
Download PDF

"It's a f*cking teddy bear!"
Download PDF

"It's the same as last year!"
Download PDF

"It's the same thing I bought my mistress!"
Download PDF

"It's NSFW!"
Download PDF

"It's over!"
Download PDF
Crapping Paper Generator

Gone and found something different? Not to worry! The patent-pending Crapping Paper™ Generator is here to save the day.

So what are you giving them? Oysters? A Terrahawks DVD? Some poppers? Something a guy at work made? Insane flowers? A blender? A Hello Kitty blender? A Hello Kitty dildo? Some cheese? Some insane cheese? A giant inflatable vagina? A porcelain figurine representing your love? An e-card?

Whatever random crap you’ve bought the love of your life, there's a Crapping Paper™ to fit. So get crapping, crappers!

We're not at all sure why you'd want to, but you can tweet us if you'd like. You can even leave a comment below if you're so inclined. You weirdo.

Why not tell us what you wrapped in Crapping Paper™. Or what you created using the Generator. Or what the love of your life thought. Or like, whatever...

Another piece of crap from the Johnny & Angus
Design and illustration crapped out by Rob Bootle
Crapping Paper™ Generator created via freelancer.com
Site hosted at PlantPotWeb
© 2013 CrappingPaper.com